The many (deadly) forms of the spork.

In its quest to create the perfect eating machine, mankind has struck gold with the Spork, the combination fork-spoon utensil that allows the user to both poke and scoop food simultaneously. Today, however, the spork will face a far greater challenge than any microwave dinner or KFC meal–my couch!
That’s right, folks. My plan to destroy the couch with a Saab 9000 fell through, mainly because one of the pistons in the Saab‘s engine ‘fell’ through the engine block. In retrospect, though, I think the spork will be a tougher challenge anyway.